Don’t be clever until you first become a writer. Right now you are trying to be clever. Porn Why not try to tell a straight story that starts at the beginning and stops at the end? i was definatly captured all the way to the end. Why not try to tell a straight story that starts at the beginning and stops at the end? WordytomvtsReport 2008-10-26 06:29:19great story, more please«1» a simple story line whould have worked much better. i was definatly captured all the way to the end. WordytomvtsReport 2008-10-26 06:29:19great story, more please«1» i was definatly captured all the way to the end. 3 comments«1»aceofhartsReport 2008-10-27 07:55:27Excellent story!!!!! a simple story line whould have worked much better.




















